Michael Bentine's Potty Time
Episode One - The Foam fighters
Michael and the Professor are going through what appears to be the alphabetical listing of the Potty guide to Potty history. F is brought up on his occasion day. F for Foam fighters. As if by magic the Potty Foam Fighters appear. Their motto is to fight foam first and fire second. When asked what foam they are referring to, "Foam from washing machines and factories." It represents a deadly threat. The invasion of the foam began a year ago. An innocent fisherman was taken whilst at Teddington Lock. Two others, Mable and Norman out bird watching were also consumed by the expanding foam.
Things get so bad that the Foam Fighters are summoned to see the Under Secretary to the Assistant Semi Permanent Personal Private Secretary to the Third Minister without Port Folio, Department of the Environment (himself). Together the Minister and the Foam Fighters see the foam consuming the Houses of Parliament and Big Ben. The fearful foam is still rising. As luck would have it a wandering tramp whiffing of something awful is nearby. The foam takes one smell of the tramp and starts to retreat. "That is it, the answer" shouts the Minister. Detergents cannot stand muck and dirt. "Have an O.B.E." he says to the tramp.
And so ends one of the greatest threats the Potties have ever been faced with.
Episode Two - The Invisible Potty
How do you see an invisible Potty? You only knows he or she is there because things happen replies the Professor. Footprints appear in the snow and sand and no one is about. The invisible Potty appears to Michael who cannot see him. Only when some books move and the invisible Potty starts talking can we know he is really there. The invisible Potty is apparently wanted by Scotland Yard (reason not clear). Sergeant Pottering and the Chief Superintendent are considering the invisible Potty's crimes. He is wanted for stealing strange and mysterious things, such as who removed the bow wave from the Queen Elizabeth.
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson arrive and state that they too have been after the invisible Potty. Only the other night at 3 o'clock in the morning, at the house of Lord and Lady Potweasel at Nethergarments Under the Wash. Some person stole down the path, opened the gate, stole across the ground, pushed past the tree, moved along the bushes, walked across the drive way, climbed the Virginia Creeper on the West Wing, opened the top window, stole through the sleeping house, opened the farthest window in the East wing, climbed down the East wing Virginia Creeper and made his/her escape down the drive.
"What was taken?" asked the Superintendent. "Nothing has been seen to have been stolen" replied Holmes. "Nothing has been seen" replies the Superintendent, "then it must be the work of the invisible potty."
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson traced the invisible Potty through rain and hail, over hill and dale to a cottage. They went inside and the footprints ended there. After they have entered the cottage and suddenly heard footsteps coming towards the house. The door opened and shut but they could see no one. Footsteps were heard inside. A glass of milk was drunk. Some person adjusted the clock hands and set the pendulum going and then went to bed. Holmes and Watson return to Scotland Yard since they do not have the power of arrest. The Superintendent and his Sergeant go to the cottage and suddenly realise that they can't arrest the invisible Potty as he has done nothing wrong.
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The Potty Safari
The Potty in the